Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Encyclopedia Simpsonica"

Your ability to find a Simpsons quote for every situation is very endearing. Someday, you might find the same enthusiasm for something I want to talk about.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Cleaning is Fun"

You've been a great housemate. The only way it could be better is if you cleaned up after yourself.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Forward Filter"

E-mail has really brought us together, but stop sending me forwards.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "One Track Blind"

Stories about your time abroad are very interesting and I also look forward to talking about other things again.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "You Got Filtered!"

Don't e-mail me again. Not even to acknowledge this message.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Custom Time Zone"

If you ever make a resolution to be punctual, let me know, since I'm in the habit of adding 30 minutes to your official arrival time.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Sofa Eviction Notice"

It's been great having you around, but your couch surfing privileges are coming to an end.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Loud Cell-phone Talker"

A lot of people have really loud voices when they talk on the phone and still lead perfectly full and rich lives. And you're one of those people and I want to help you.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Enlightenment is Boring from the Outside"

Hearing about your spiritual journey has been wildly enriching. I hope you arrive soon at a place of peace and silence.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Flush card"

Hearing a background toilet flush when you're talking on the phone is somehow not comforting.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Pun Quota"

Puns are funniest in small quantities.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Time Sensitive"

If I thought it would make a difference, I'd buy you a watch.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Pet Intimacy"

I admire the great relationship you have with your pet. Except for the monthly expenses, baby talk, and permanent household odor.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Poor Multi-tasking"

When you talk on the phone while websurfing, the other person can tell.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Glory Days Barnacle"

When they told us high school would be the best days of our lives, they didn't realize some of us would never leave.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Please Curb your Spam "

I admire your taste in e-mail forwards, but this doesn't mean I have the time to read them.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Denial Declaration"

This card issues a ban on all weight gain inquiries. Let us usher in a healthy age of denying physical reality.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "End of Couch-Surfing Era"

It saddens me to come to the end of an era, but it's time for you to stop sleeping on my couch.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Long-Term Guest Transition"

It's been great having you around. And it could be even better if you paid part of the rent.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: ""Irony" Memo"

You were actually easier to stomach when you just made sexist jokes instead of "joking" about being a sexist.

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Home area roaming"

There's something unsettling about talking on the phone and hearing a toilet flush in the background. How about at least covering the mouthpiece?

Just so you know :: Enough Already :: "Surf's Out"

It's been great having you around, but your couch surfing privileges have come to an end.